Tom Amstutz is stepping down! I know how tommorow's press conference will sound:
"Thank you all for coming. (Eats microphone) I have done so much here at UT. Namely, I have ruined UT, delivered no MAC Titles, and ultimately, gained 497 tons from eating players who have dropped passes. (Eats first row of reporters.) That is why I feel it is time to settle down and leave this program in the hands of the suspended Nick Moore. (Eats him) Oh. How unfortunate. I guess wer had better get blown out by BG again this year. (Is placed under arrest for public no-ingness) Oh. How unfortunate. Well, I guess we will have to give the program to Joe Tiller (Guess what happens) How unfortuanate. DEATHHHHHHHHHHHHHH"